par: Ashley Brown

mis à jour le 11 février 2020

médicalement examiné par: Karen Devlin, LPC

Doyoususpectyouorsomeoneyouknowmaybeengaginginindulgentparenting?Areyouworriedthatindulgentparentingmaybeharmfultoyourchildorsomeoneelse de l’?Youshouldbe.

Ifyouarelikemanyparents,youprobablywonderwhatthebestwaytoparentyourchildrenis.Maybeyou’veevenwonderedifthereareknowntechniquesthatdoordon’tworkwhenitcomestoraisingwell-adjustedhumanbeings.,Thetruthisthattherearenearlyasmanyparentingstrategiesasthereareparents,andthere’sconflictingadviceonwhatworksbest.However,thereareafewestablishedcategoriesofparentingbehavior,andresearchhasshownthatsomestylesarebetterthanothers.

That’swhywe’veuncoveredallthelatestresearchaboutindulgentparenting,andwhatwediscoveredisthatit’soneoftheworstthingsyoucandoforyourchild.

surpris?

Thenyoushouldreadontofindoutthedetailsofwhatindulgentparentingmeansandwhyit’sadangertochildren’sdevelopment.,

vous vous interrogez sur les effets de la parentalité indulgente?

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Source:pexels.com

Qu’est-ce qui est Indulgentparent?

commençons à parler des styles de parentage.Parentingstyleisacategoryusedbypsychologiststoanalyzevariouswaysofraisingchildrenandtheresultsofthosemethods.,Thereareseveraldifferentstandardparentingstyles,whicharemostcommonlydividedintofourdifferentstyles.

Eachparentingstyleismadeupofasetofpractices.Ifthemajorityofyourparentingpracticesfallintoaparticularstyle,thenyoucouldsaythatistheparentingstyleyouusemostoften.Youdon’tnecessarilyneedtofolloweverypracticeassociatedwithaparticularstyletoassociatewiththatparentingstyle.Bien sûr,eachparentraisestheirchildrenslightlydifferentfromothers.Par conséquent,thesestylesandpracticescanhavemanyvariations.,

Thefourcommonlynamedstylesare:

  • Authoritarianparenting
  • Authoritativeparenting
  • Uninvolvedparenting
  • Indulgent/permissiveparenting

Keepinmindthatevenifyouleantowardsonestyle,youmaynotalwaysactlikethatstyle.Parentscansometimesswitchbetweenstylesdependingonfactors,likehowtiredtheyare,ortheirtolerancelevelsforcertainbehaviors,aswellasotherfactors.

Source:exatmiseis.l’ue

PermissiveParenting

Indulgentparentingisalsoknownaspermissiveparenting.,Inthisparentingstyle,theparentrarelyenforcesanyrulesandtendstoletchildrenacthowevertheywant.Theseparentsoftenseemmorelikefriendswiththeirkids,ratherthanparents.

Indulgentparentsareoftenhighlyresponsivetotheirchildren,whichdistinguishesthemfromuninvolvedparents.It’snotthatindulgentparentsareignoringtheirchildren;theysimplyallowthemtogetawaywithalot.

Indulgentparentsprobably Feellikereallygoodparents.Theylovetheirkidsandwantthemtobehappy.,Whattheymaynotrealizeisthattheirlowexpectationsfortheirkidstranslatetothekidsthemselves,resultinginchildren(andfutureadults)withlowexpectationsforthemselves.

examples of Indulgentparenting

Pharaon,youhaveageneralideaofwhatindulgentparentingentails.Herearesomespecificbehaviorsassociatedwithindulgentparenting.

que sbehavior Nospecificrulesareestablishedforchildren’. Rulesareinconsistentandsituational,oronlyupheldwhentheparentistiredorsomeotherarbitraryreason.,

  • Theparentislovingandnurturingbutmayoverpraisethechild,makingitdifficultforthechildtounderstandwhichbehaviorsaregoodorexceedingexpectations. sfriend Theparentactsliketheirchild’. Les parents offrent des cadeaux,des jouets ou de la nourriture pour les aider à établir leurs attentes.
  • Thechildisgivenlittlestructureorschedule,lackingadailyroutineordailyexpectationsforage-appropriateresponsibilities.
  • Lesparentsputthepriority Ofgivingthechildfreedomoverteachingresponsability.,

  • Theparentsasktheirchildrenforanopiniononmajordecisions,ratherthanhelpingthechildtocopewithdecisionsthataremadebytheadults.
  • le champ D’application correspond à Desconséquences forcées par Lesparents.

    ResultsOfIndulgentParenting

    Manyissuesarisefromindulgentparentingbecausechildrenarenotpreparedtomakegooddecisionsforthemselves.Theyneedparentstointerveneattimesandsetrules.Theseconsequencesarenotjustpsychologicaleither.Childrenofindulgentparentsaremorelikelytohaveaslewofhealthproblemsbecausetheparentsdonotenforcehygieneorhealthyhabits.,

    droit

    La Vie N’est pas toujours ce que nous voulons.Cependant,indulgentparentswilltrytogivetheirchildrenalltheyneedorwant,thinkingtheyarebeingsupportive.Theproblemwiththisisitsetsupafalserealityforthechild,goingforwardinlife.Theyexpectthattheywillalwayshaveeveryneedandwantmet,withoutanyeffortontheirpart.

    Youmaynotwantyourchildtosufferbyfeelingadesirethatgoesunfulfilled,butthisisanimportantlessonforlife.

    Additionally,childrenwhoarepraisedtoooftenforminorachievementsfeelliketheydeservepraiseforverylittleeffort.,Thisresultsinadultswhoputintheminimaleffortandcomplainwhentheydon’tgettheresultstheywant.Theymayblameothersfortheirproblems,despiteputtingintheneededenergytosolvetheirproblems.

    PoorImpulseControl

    Youngchildrenarenotyetcapableofsettingboundariesonhowtheyusetheirtimeorhowmuchofafavoritethingtheyindulgein.Parentswhosetboundariesteachtheirchildrenself-discipline,sothatthechildcaneventuallymakegooddecisionsabouttimemanagementandlimitingthemselveswithbehaviors,likescreentimeoreatingjunkfood.,

    Sincethesechildrenaregivennoexpectations,theyarealsomorelikelytoengageinriskybehaviors,includingunderagedrinkinganddruguse.Theyhavenofearoftheirparentsdiscipliningthemforsuchbehaviors.

    Theyarealsomorelikelytohaveconductissuesatschool.Thereasonforthisisthelackofguidanceandstructureathome.Theyareunaccustomedtolisteningtoanadultinauthority.Thatmakesitdifficultforthemtofollowschoolrulesbecausetheybecomeresentfulofthesituationatschool.,

    Withschoolbehaviors,inparticular,thechildmayseemlikeastudentwhoiseagertopleasemostofthetimeandonlyhasdisciplineissueswhenaparticularruleaggravatesthechild.That’stypicalbecausetheindulgentparentshavemadethechildaccustomedtobeingoftenpraised,andthechildwillseekthisbehaviorfromteachersandotheradults,behavingaslongasitisconvenient.

    Thefurtherresultofthisisyourchildgrowingintoanadultwithcontinuedunhealthyhabitsandpoormotivationtodowellatworkorotherpriorities.Thiscanleadtoobesityandpoorhealth,aswellasapoorfinancialoutlook.,

    vous vous interrogez sur les effets de la parentalité indulgente?

    un thérapeute certifié peut vous aider. Parlez à un expert parental en ligne maintenant.

    Source:pexels.com

    la diversité avec la complexité de la gratification

    Relatedtoentitlementbehaviorisadifficultywithadelayofgratification.Delayinggratificationisanecessaryskill.It’srequiredforactivitieslikesavingmoneyforaparticularexpenseorstayinginshapebyfollowinggoodeatinghabitsandexercisingregularly.Youdonotgetafitbodyinstantly.Moreover,youcannotaffordeverythingwithoutsavingsometimes.,Whenyougeteverythingyouwantexactlywhenyouwantit,youdonotlearnthisskill,andyourqualityoflifesuffers.

    ImpulsiveAngerAndFrustration

    Thesechildrencanbecomeadultsthatareaggressiveandlackanormalamountofemotionalunderstandingwhendealingwithothers.Theyhaven’tlearnedtocontroltheiremotionsinproductivewaysbecausetheyareusedtogettingwhatevertheywant.Malheureusement,interactingwiththeadultworldrequirescompromisingwithothersandnotalwaysgettingyourway.Thatmakesadultrelationshipsandcareerachievementsdifficultforthem.,

    DifficultyHandlingMoney

    Inadditiontohavingahardtimesucceedingfinancially,childrenofindulgentparentsalsohaveahardtimeholdingontomoneyoncetheygetit.Theirimpulsivenessmakesthempronetospendingmoneyassoonastheyhaveany.Thissetsthemupforfuturefinancialdifficulties.

    L’âge-Impropreeactions(LesserMaturityComparedToPeers)

    Childrenwhoareentitledandgetwhattheywantallthetimearealsomorelikelytothrowtantrumsbeyondtheusualageforsuchbehavior.Theyarelikelytobelazierthanotherchildrentheirage,doingonlythethingsthatinterestthemratherthantakingresponsibilityforthethingstheyneedtodo.,Il’seasytoseehowthiscausestroubleinadulthood.Weallhavemanyresponsibilitiesthatwedon’tnecessarilywanttodo,butmust.

    À court terme,c’est un travail scolaire.Thechildrenofindulgentparentsaremorelikelytoprocrastinateonhomeworkandschoolprojects.Theydon’tfeellikedoingthework,sotheyputitoff,andtheirgradessuffer.

    LowSelf Estime de soi

    Itmayseemlikechildrenwhoarelovedandgeteverythingtheywantshouldfeelgoodaboutthemselves.Whattendstohappenisthattheyneverdeveloptheskillstohandleproblems,andwhentheyreachanagewheretheyneedtodothingsontheirown,theyhavenoideahowto.,Theyhavenointernalmotivationtosucceed.Theyendupanxiousandunabletomeetthedemandsofbeinganadult.Theymayevenfeelunprepared.

    Otherchildren,bycontrast,havehadtoworkthroughstruggles.Theylearnmotivationandself-détermination.Thisispreciselywhatbuildsself confiance.Thosechildrenlearnthattheyarecapableandcanovercomeobstacles.

    ComparingOtherParentingStyles

    Ici’sthebigproblemwithindulgentparenting.Bynotcreatingandenforcingrules,youarenotteachingyourchildbasiccopingskills.Weallhavetofollowtherulesandaccepttheconsequencesofouractions.

    D’Autresparentingstyleshavedifferentresults.,Autoritaireparentingalsodoesnotteachenfantocopewithadulthood, butfordifferentreasons.Theauthoritarianparenthasstrictrules,tothepointthatchildrenneverlearntomakeanydecisionsforthemselves.Theirchildrenmayfearpunishment,buttheydonotlearntomakebetterchoicesfromtheirmistakes.Les enfantsmaiventavecl’autoritaireparentantstylebecomingexcellentliarstoavoidpunitions.

    Uninvolvedorneglectfulparentingiswhentheparentspaylittletonoattentiontothechild.Therearenorulesbecausetheparentisnotpayingattentiontowhatthekidisdoinganyway.,Unlikeindulgentparenting,thesechildrengetneitherrulesnorlovingattention.Theyareontheirowntonavigatechildhoodandlife.Thesechildrentendtohavelow-estime de soi,l’pooracademicperformance,andareunhappy.

    Enfin,thereisauthoritativeparenting.Thisisnotthesameasauthoritarianparenting.Authoritativeparentingisthebeststyleforraisingwell-developed,happychildrenwithagoodsenseofboundaries.

    Authoritativeparentsputeffortintocreatingalovingrelationshipwiththeirchildren,aswellasestablishingrulesandexpectations.Theyexplainthereasonsbehindtheirrulesratherthanjustexpectingobedience.,Theyallowtheirchildrentohaveopinions,buttheydon’tnecessarilygiveintotheirchildrenafterlisteningtotheirpointofview.

    Someofthebenefitsofauthoritativeparentingarewell-adjustedkidsandalovingrelationshipbetweenyouandyourchildren.Thesebenefitshappenbecausethisparentingstyleiswellbalanced.Whileyoumaydisciplineyourkids,youcanalsoexplaintothemwhytheyarebeingdisciplined.Additionally,thelinesofcommunicationarealwaysopenbetweenyouandyouroffspringandtheywillbeabletounderstandthattheyarelovedandthattheiropinionisimportant.,

    Correctingentparentingbavior

    Ifyou’vebeenengaginginindulgentparentingandhavedecidedyoudon’twantthetypeoffutureoutlookitcanleadtoforyourchild,don’tdespair.Youcanstarttakingstepsnowtocorrectthisbehavior.Thestepsthemselvesaresimple,thoughyoumaystrugglewithenforcingthem.Justkeepwithitandunderstandthatitwillbeachangeforyouandyourchildandthatitwillhavelong-termbenefitsforthem.

    EstablishRules

    Thefirstthingyouneedtodoisestablishrulesforyourhome.Youcanstartwithjustafewbasicexpectationsandlimits.Whatisequallyimportanttohavingrulesismakingthemcleartoyourchild.,Ifyourchildrencanread,hangalistoftherulessomewheretheycanseeit.Oruseapicturelist.

    Somepossiblerulesthatwillbeeasyforthemtofolloware,brushyourteethafterdinner,cleanupyourroomeachweek,anddoyourhomework.Justbesuretoexplainwhytheyneedtodothesethings.Makesuretheyunderstandthereasonswhyitisimportanttofollowtheserules.

    Source:.com

    avoir des consequences de lecture

    Vous Deveztrynottomakeupdisciplinaryactionsasyougo.Thesedon’tcreateastablesenseofconsequencesforbehaviorforyourchild.Au lieu de cela,makeitclearaheadoftimewhattheconsequenceswillbeforbreakingarule.,Foryoungchildren,timeoutsoftenwork.Forolderkids,losingcertainprivilegesforawhileisareasonabledisciplinaryaction.

    BeConsistent

    Youhavetofollowthroughwithrulesandconsequencesforyourchildtounderstandtheresultsoftheiractions.Youdonothavetobemean.Rememberthatbeingfirmdoesnotmeanyoudon’tloveyourchild.

    Youareprovidingstructurepreciselybecauseyoudolovethem,andyouwantthemtohaveagoodfuture.Youcanalsotalktoyourchildrenandhelpthemtounderstandtherules,andwhytheyareinplace.

    ProvideRewards

    Thebesthabitsareestablishedwithasystemofbothdisciplineandrewards.,Inadditiontocorrectingachildforbreakingarule,noticewhentheybehaveespeciallywell.Vous pouvezfournir des privilèges spéciauxsontvoyésdurantsfois.Avoidmaterialrewardslikecandyortoys.Onemethodistotakeawayscreentimeforbadbehaviorandrewardadditionalscreentimeforgoodbehavior.

    ParentingIsDifficultForEveryone

    Ifyouneedtoadjustyourparentingstyle,itcanbedifficult.Cependant,youmustdothisforyourchild’sfuture.Youwantthemtobewell-adjustedandknowtheirworth.Bien sûr,youdon’thavetogothroughthisfrustratingprocessalone.,Attimeswhenayoungchilddoesn’tunderstandnewrulesorwhytheyhavetodosomethingyoutellthemtodo,youmaywanttothrowinthetowel.Thereisnoreasonto!Youcanworkwithalicensedcounselor,whocanhelpyoualteryourparentingtechniques.Theywillbeabletoassistyouwhenitcomestosettingupfirmrules,figureouthowtocorrectlydisciplineyourkids,andprovidecopingstrategiesforthetryingtimes.

    Parentsandchildrencanbenefitfromcounselingbyalicensedprofessional.Theywillbeabletohelpyoupinpointissuesandfigureouthowtosolvethemtogether.Theymayalsohelpyoufixbehavioralorotherproblemsearly,beforetheyturnintosomethinglarge.,

    Cependant,busyparentsmaynothavethetimetodrivetoanappointmentduringacounselor’sofficehours.Thisiswhereonlinecounselingserviceslikeregainoffersolutions.Youcangetthetherapyyouneedwheneverandwhereverisconvenientforyou(suchasthecomfortofyourownhome).BelowaresomereviewsofReGaincounselors,fromparentsexperiencingarangeofissues.

    CounselorReviews

    « Denaehasastrongbackgroundinchildpsychology.Wecametoherbecausewe’refiguringouthowtonavigateourfirstyearwithanewborntogether.,Sheunderstandscouplesdynamics,personalitystylesandisveryknowledgeableonsecureattachmentandhowtoraiseachildtofeelseen,understood,safeandheard.IHighlyrecommendthiscounselor. »

    « Jessicahasreallyhelpedustoworkthroughsomeverydifficulttimesafterlivingthroughtwocategory5hurricaneslastyearwithtwosmallchildreninourhousehold.Shehasdoneanexcellentjobofhelpingustoidentifyourownattachmentfearsandgivingusguidanceonhowtonavigatesomeincrediblytryingsituations., »

    Conclusion

    Parentingishardattimes;whetherweadmititornot,everyonestruggles.Whetheryouwanttochangeyourindulgentparentingbehaviororjustimproveyourskills,alicensedprofessionalhastheexpertisetohelpyougetthere.Nomatterwhatyouoryourchildrenareexperiencing,withtherighttoolsandhelp,youcanbuildaparentingstylethatprotectsyourchildren’shealthandfutureprosperity.Takethefirststep.

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